From my side of the dam

your relation to the dam is relative, let's meet on the bridge

Month: June, 2013

Together and Alone

What do you say when there’s no words to say it?

What do you write when there’s nothing to say?

You hold hands, you hug tightly, you gaze into the distance in silence, together and alone.

And it is enough.

But what do you do when you are a half day’s journey away with only thoughts and memories to bind your souls?

How can one who comes and goes sympathize with one who stays; with one who has no place to go?

With violence staring at her across the fence.

It will never be enough.

Sleep when the baby sleeps

We are a small team at the moment.  Pierre, Stewart, and I are holding down the fort while Caldwell is at home but once Caldwell arrives back in Barranca Stewart leaves for six months.  If all goes as planned we’ll have another full time member on board come July but she’ll be going for language training in August, just as I leave for my first stint in the North.  So yeah, we’re a little short on warm bodies here.

And to top it off, we have had an international delegation here the past two weeks who fly out on Wednesday, and both Las Pavas and El Garzal are in crisis and are asking for more permanent accompaniment.  Hence why I haven’t been able to write very often.

Two weeks ago the Las Pavas community was shot at again while bringing the tractor onto their land, and a couple of days later Tito, a community member and good friend of mine, was beat up badly, sustaining blows to the head and body and cuts from machetes.  He was taken to a hospital a couple of hours by canoe and received 9 stitches on his knee.  When the delegation met with him in Las Pavas this week he was on his way to get a CAT scan because he’d been having several dizzy spells.  The community’s lawyer is graciously paying for his health care out of her pocket.

I had planned to be on that trip to Las Pavas to see Tito and help out with the delegation.  I was not able to go because we had an emergency call to El Garzal because of threats occurring in the area.

I don’t even want to get into the administrative aspects of all this.

My honeymoon stage here in Colombia may be coming to an end although not quite unexpected as all of my energy these past two months have been met with the grim faces of my teammates saying, “yeah, but there’s only 3 of us”.  I just smiled and continued on in good spirits.  Well my friends, I’ve finally come to the realization along with probably quite a few other women after their honeymoon: there’s a baby on the way and it’s going to be the death of me (and a little less cute, little more political, violent, and complex and unfortunately won’t be pacified with food, sleep, or a clean diaper).

What to do?  Sleep when the baby sleeps.